The world is going to hell: they sell these to children! And the ho costume is sold out, even. Pfft.
I better write my National Merit essay soonish, or I won’t be getting all that nice money. I hate proselytizing about me — none of the reasons why I am great sound compelling outside of my head. All I really am is ambition and a little cleverness (and, today, good hair).
Rrrrrrrrgh… must kill National Merit! My awesomeness is too vast to contain in a mere 500 words, yet simultaneously too vague to yield more than two meaningful sentences!
And I had to miss a perfectly good marching band rehearsal to pick up those stupid forms…
aren’t you still not supposed to tell anyone other than your immediate family about national merit?
immediate family, everyone on the internet, what’s the difference.
Just a hint to prospective National Merit candidates (especially you, Aaron)… don’t write your essays in the same tone as your posts, as if you’re constantly frustrated and overwhelmed by what an amazing person you are.
you should update your music section
Franzi - Really? I didn’t hear anything about that. Maybe it’s written on the forms; I’ll go check if I have the time.
Anonymous - You mean I shouldn’t sign it “Aaron, Eighth Wonder of the Modern World”?
try it and see what happens. there *was* one merit semifinalist at westwood last year who didn’t advance.
but that had nothing to do with essays, if what I hear is true. Then again, it’s truth is about as reliable as mall parking on christmas eve. But still, I doubt it was essay-related.
self-advertisement *is* difficult, especially when one is trying to out-self-advertise 16000 people (many of whom self-advertise regularly for fun and/or profit.) you should write about how your moral indignation against ho costumes contibutes to worldwide diversity. (or possibly not.)
carl, that is not a very good idea. i ended up writing about a ‘holistic worldview’ and how my crazy organization-conquering ambition was actually a Good Thing.
anonymous person from UT dorms: I could totally find out who you are using my magical IP-tracking skills. Thus, ha. Also, don’t be mean to Aaron, coping with the greatness of Aaron is a challenge for the ages.
franzi & arvind: you’re right. oops. they better not track me down, after all the time i spent on this essay. that would be the suck.